Potty Training Readiness Skills: How to Know When Your Child is Ready
Curious if your child is ready for potty training? It’s important that both you and your toddler are prepared for this exciting transition! Did you know that developmentally speaking, the transition from diapers to underwear follows a generally predictable progression?
Most children develop control over their bowel and bladder around 18 months old. Many children become mostly potty trained between 2-3 years of age, with boys typically achieving the feat later than girls (sometimes as late as 4 years old).
However, it’s not about starting at a specific age, it’s about starting when your child is physically AND emotionally ready. Your child may start potty training earlier or later than you thought and that’s ok!
Signs Your Child is Ready for Potty Training (in no particular order):
Stays dry for at least 2 hours at a time or wakes up dry from nap time.
Recognizes that they are urinating or having a bowel movement (i.e. touching their diaper, going into another room, or under a table on a consistent basis when they go to the bathroom).
Has the physical ability to do the following: pull pants down and up, walk, and only requires some help to get on and off the toilet.
Your child is interested in a parent/caregiver’s toileting behavior and attempts to copy it.
Can follow simple instructions via responses that are verbal, actions, or gestures.
Expresses interest in wearing “big kid” underwear.
Has regular bowel movements on a consistent basis.
Can communicate their need to go to the bathroom BEFORE actually going to the bathroom (verbally or through their actions).
They urinate at consistent intervals.
Your child is willing and able to sit on the toilet for short periods of time.
If your child can do most of these skills, then your child is likely ready for potty training!
If your child isn’t displaying these signs or milestones, don’t stress. Every child is different. Follow their lead and don’t pressure them if their brother or sister was potty trained by a certain age. Potty training success will come!
Other Considerations with Potty Training Readiness:
Photo by Ketut Subiyanto
Try your best to choose a potty training time frame that is relatively stable and calm. It is best to avoid beginning the potty training process just before or during a big transition such as a move, right before or after the addition or return of a family member, etc. This will help you and your child maintain as much consistency and follow-through as possible. Remember, the process can occur very differently for each child, depending on their personality and circumstances. So, keep this in mind when you are working with each of your children both now and in the future!
Be positive!
Your child does not have to be talking effectively in order to be potty trained. This is where the power of gestures comes into play! (i.e. a child touching their diaper to indicate they need to go or walking to the bathroom).
Keep in mind that the following skills tend to develop between 3-5 years of age, after the initial potty training has occurred. These skills also add to a child’s success with potty training:
Seats self on toilet and uses it independently.
Independent toileting, which includes being able to tear the toilet paper, flush, wash hands, and manage potty-related clothing on their own.
A few things you can do to help progress a child who is not YET ready for potty training:
Continue to model the toileting behaviors/routine for your child and have them participate or observe you.
If you see that a child is actively going to the bathroom in their diaper (i.e. they go under the table for a bowel movement every time), say something like this: “Oh (insert child’s name), your pooping” to help them learn what it happening inside their body.
Ask them, “did you poop/pee?” on a regular basis, especially when you know they have gone. Even if they are incorrect via a verbal or physical response, this will help them to learn to tell you when they need to be changed.
Have your child sit on the toilet without pants/diaper on a routine basis (before nap, after nap, when they wake up, etc). Even if they do not go, the experience of sitting on the toilet for a few minutes on a consistent basis will help with this transition. If they are not interested and want to get off right away, that is fine. Follow their lead and do your best to make it a positive experience!
BE POSITIVE!
The process can occur very differently for each child, depending on their personality and circumstances. So, keep this in mind when you are working with each of your children both now and in the future!